The Fatherless Daughter

Is there a sale going on today?? Can I get some free food or snacks somewhere??

The fact that I haven't celebrated Father's Day since I was 8 y.o.... That was my mom and I last year living with my grandparents and my family would celebrate my wonderful grandfather. After that, there was no reason to celebrate it! I mean, I still send him cards and call him every year, but it's not the same!

See...my dad was one of those "pop up" dads. He and my mom split when I was a baby, and he's been in and out of my life ever since. He'd send a big box of gifts at Christmas and my birthday, and call every now and then but we have NEVER really had a relationship. That was something I'd always longed for, I wanted to know what it felt like and experience being a "Daddy's girl"! Nope...Just my mom and I.
SN: Thank GOD for her, I don't know where I would be without her.

When we moved back to Houston, I was excited because my dad lived here and I just figured that

we'd have that daddy/daughter relationship I had always wanted....NOT!

He came around when it was convenient, made promises he didn't keep....U know regular deadbeat ish. He did that for a few years after we moved back and one day he just went MIA. I mean nothing, when I was 14 years old until I was in my early 20's! Don't ask me where he went....I concluded that he went back to Africa(where he is from).
During that time, I had a hard time in my relationships with men. Looking for some kind of love and attention, from men. I dealt with some grade-A losers, u hear me!!??! Giving them chance after chance, accepting inconsistency, putting up with unnecessary bs. Just because I was trying to fill THAT void, you know? I wanted love and attention from a man! That went on for my teen years and well into my early 20's. I had a baby at 15 and was a rebellious and promiscuous teen. As I got older, I masked the hurt and pain with being "independent", putting an imaginary wall up, acting hard, crass and overly sarcastic. Back then I had no idea what was going on with me, but now I can look back and see what it was! Thank GOD for self  discovery and acceptance!

So, I'm 20 something... and this man actually contacted my cousin I grew up with, in order to reach me! Go figure!

So, here he comes again with this BS.....by this time in life, I'm over it. But now, I have a son and he starts doing the same bs to him! No sir, you will NOT!!! So, I stopped letting him interact with him period. He is still popping in and out, random phone calls, and weird visits. Currently, he's MIA yet again. I don't know if he's dead or alive.
What I DO know is that, I suffered for many years because of the broken relationship with my dad. See, I was broken myself on the inside...which caused me to do a variety of things that I can now see were caused by what I was lacking and seeking to fill that void with. I am grateful that I can now see the error in my ways and do better. I am grateful that I can move forward with my life and be a better mother, daughter and mate.
What I am MOST grateful for is that my MESS is now a MESSAGE and I can hopefully help a young girl that is going through what I went through as a teen/young adult or that young woman van take my story and now realize the error in her ways and do better!

Keep pushing fatherless daughters.... It gets greater, later!!!

XoXo

- Crysy

Looking Yummy With A Tummy

Ladies!

Let's be real. We all have an area(s) of our body that we'd like to work on or wish there was something we could do to change it permanently.
For ME, it's my tummy! This "problem area" as some call it, and myself definitely have a love/hate relationship.
Fashionably, it makes wearing some items almost impossible (In MY Opinion). Shape wear or foundation is always an option.....BUT those are tricky as well and most times uncomfortable!
As style guru Sarah Shah, wrote about in her book(with the same title), you gotta "Dress Yourself Skinny"!
Often times, when I post pictures on social media, there is at least one person that comments about weight loss. I take it as a compliment, but No, I haven't lost weight... I just know how to "minimize" the appearance of my tummy!
"How do you do that?", you ask.
It's simple! I promise!
-Your bra! Wearing the improper bra size can definitely make you appear larger and more shapeless than you actually are. Dillard's, Victoria Secret, JC Penny and many more retailers offer bra fittings at no cost!
- Wear a (dark) top or an accessory that will take the focus off of your tummy. It also makes your waist appear smaller. I like wearing off the shoulder tops as well as big chunky necklaces. You can also add a belt!
-Wear a bottom that will SMOOTH
the tummy, not SQUEEZE it! We all love a cute form fitting dress/skirt, but honey if that tummy is showing and pooched out because of it being too tight, LIG(Let It Go)!  I love skater and a-line dresses and skirts for THIS very reason! Those styles don't hug at your tummy area and place more focus on your waist! And make your body appear smaller!
-Patterns widen the appearance of your hips!
-A bottom with a gathered waist and/or wide waistband works great as well!
-Jumpsuits and rompers are great, as well as long as they aren't too form fitting in the stomach area. They seem to smooth the tummy area and accentuate your behind! 😉
Get in your closet! See what you can find! Drop a few pounds without the gym.
Thank me later!
XoXo
Crysy

Prints are our friends, ladies!!! When worn properly, might I add. On this model, the black off the shoulder top, gatheted waist and all over pattern make her waist appear smaller, as well as places focus on her shoulders and not her tummy area.

An A-line dress!! Dress has a gathered waist and doesn't hug her tummy! Add a belt and, voila! 😊

A romper! Added a big chunky neclace! It gathers at the waist with the help of a cute belt and smoothed out her tummy area!